"Cats and Dogs" Part Two~ For PicFic Tuesday 2/2

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

“Lisa, you know Illya's not happy about being here, too many dogs. The ride over in the van, though only ten minutes, was so tense that you could have cut the air with a knife.”

“Wollman? You’re kidding? He’s the nicest dog.”

“Illya sees every canine as a potential killing machine, with him as their eventual target.”

“Poor guy, doesn’t know what he’s missing out on; well at least he likes cats. Come to think of it, you don’t like cats do you?” Lisa chuckled.

“No not really. Illya’s cat Nina used to attack my ankles like they were her next meal.”

“And now she likes you?”

“No, Illya gave her to his neighbor as he felt it was unfair to the cat since he was out of town too much. His neighbor’s cat had died and well, she got along with Nina already so a problem was solved for both of them.

“Now that was really kind of him. I know he was fond of that cat.”

“I understand he still gets to visit with her...and his neighbor is a really good cook, so he kills two birds with one stone.”

“Ewww, a girlfriend perhaps?”

“No, I don’t think Illya is into eighty year old women.”

That gave Lisa a bit of a laugh.

Exam room 2 was finally freed up; Napoleon and Lisa were allowed to search it, bringing Wollman with them.  The carry cage had been left there so he got a real good whiff of his feline friend’s scent.

“Good boy Wolly, go find the kitty,” Napoleon encouraged,” Find Speedy...whatever his name is.”

The dog pulled and tugged at the leash, dragging Solo around the exam room as he sniffed everywhere after burying his face in the carry case. He whined, recognizing his friend’s scent. Wollman scratched at the door and as soon as it was opened he pulled Napoleon through it with Lisa in tow.

The dog whined again, stopping and sniffing cabinets and shelving in the next room that served as a lab.

“Whoa! What’s this?” A man wearing a white lab coat stopped them as he nearly tripped over Wollman’s outstretched leash.

“Oh Dr. Dubowy,” Lisa said.” This is Mr. Solo...Mr. Waverly sent him and his partner to help with the search for Shpion.”

“Oh yes. I’m so sorry Mr. Solo. We’ve never misplaced a patient before,” the doctor withdrew his hand from his lab coat pocket; Napoleon assumed to shake his hand.

The doctor had what looked like a guinea pig in his palm.”Oh sorry, just keeping Wilbur warm.” He transferred the animal to his other hand, before reaching out to Solo and greeting him.

Napoleon was hard pressed not to scrunch up his face.”Well, yes I guess these things happen.  As long as we find the little beast safe and sound, that’s what counts. Say you don’t have snakes around this place do you?”

“Not down here, we keep them up on the third floor as most people are uncomfortable around them. We do quite a bit of work for Ringling Brothers. So this is your partner Mr. Solo?” Dr. Dubowy offered his hand for Wollman to take a sniff.

“Partner? Oh no. My partner Mr. Kuryakin, is searching upstairs. You can’t miss him, shaggy blond hair, looks sort of intense.”

“Napoleon,” Lisa giggled,” that could describe a golden retriever you know.”

“Yeah, well my partner is quite human...sometimes. I assure you Doctor.”

“Well if you’ll excuse me Mr. Solo, Miss Rogers, I have some patients to attend to. I’m sure you’ll find the cat, and I appreciate you coming down to help us out in a bind.  Needless to say I will be owing Mr. Waverly a profuse apology and some free veterinary services for this mistake.”

Dubowy walked away, snuggling Wilbur to his nose. The animal let out some very chirps and what sounded like a purr as it and the doctor disappeared into the examination room.

Illya, searched to no avail around the surgical suite on the second floor; impressed at the level of sophistication of the equipment.

He circled several times, peering into every nook and cranny. “Shpion...psss psss psss. Zdes' kotenok, kotenok, kotenok,” He called to the cat in Russian. The cat had after all been named ‘Spy’ in the Russian language and he made sure he always spoke to it in his native tongue. He thought the cat liked him, and would come out to him, especially if it were frightened at being in a strange place.

At least that’s what he hoped. Cats were notorious for hiding just to spite you and took delight in a human’s frustration, of that Kuryakin was sure of. Shpion had that evil little personality twist despite being quite a nice cat.

He supposed that was part of the reason why he was named ‘Spy.’

Illya finally gave up, and headed up to the third floor, this time taking the elevator.

The room was dimly lit, and after he found a light switch he saw a number of plastic tubs on some shelves on the far wall. Suddenly his eyes caught some movement.

“Shpion, is that you. Come here kitty? Psss pssss pssss.” He called out. Illya walked over to the bin, moving it he saw something completely unexpected. He took one giant step backwards, and nearly jumped out of his skin when his communicator chirped. He pulled it from his pocket, quickly assembling it and answering.

“Kuryakin here.”

“Illya any luck?”

“None. I take it by your question that you have had no luck either.”

“That’s an affirmative. Oh by the way, be careful when you go to the third floor. Apparently they keep snakes up there.”

“A little late on the warning as I am staring at a rather large one as we speak, it it is a fair sized boa constrictor. From the bulge in its body I would say it ate recently...I hope it was not Shpion.”

“Hold on a second.”

Solo returned moments later.”That snake is called Samaritana and apparently she was just fed, so wasn’t the cat. They let her wander around after feeding time, apparently it’s good for her digestion. She belongs to the Ringling Circus.”

“Lovely. I will continue my search. Napoleon, cats are notorious for hiding in plain sight, so do not overlook the obvious.”

“Check. Solo out.”

Illya continued wandering through the third floor but it was in vain and he returned downstairs finding Napoleon and Lisa were in the same boat.

“Oh my God! “Miss Rogers, Mr. Solo and whoever you are,” Carlotta shouted down the hall to them. “Come quick! We found him! He’s in exam room three, but how he got there we have no idea!”

They all rushed into the room finding Dr. Dubowy talking to the sink at the workstation. Surrounding it were jars containing cotton balls, swabs, and bottles of solution.

Peering just over the edge of the stainless steel sink were a pair of wide eyes and a furry face.”

“That’s one pissed cat,” the vet said. “We’ll have to get a special pair of gloves to pick him up. Easy there Shpion.”

The cat began to wail, and is sounded as if it started all the way down from the tip of his tail. He then hissed, spitting at the vet.

“Doctor?” Illya said.

“Illya let him get the cat,” Napoleon said.

“No. Doctor Dubowy?”

“Yes? Oh you must be the partner.”

“Yes I am ‘the partner’...”Illya suddenly felt miffed as that was the second time he hadn’t been introduced. “Doctor, that is not Shpion.”

“What do you mean, of course it is Illya.” Napoleon said.

“He’s right,” Lisa chimed in.”That’s not our cat. Shpion is grey. That’s long haired tabby.”

Carlotta rushed into the room.”Doctor I’m so sorry. Mrs. Biedermann brought her cat in here by mistake. Come on kitty, let’s get you back to your mommy.”

“I wouldn’t go near him if I were you,” the vet cautioned.

“No he’s fine. Come on Mr. Snuggles, it’s all right. Who’s a good boy?” Carlotta used baby talk.

An older woman poked her head in the doorway.

“Och mein Gott, did I put meine Schnitzel Shnuggles in ze wrong room? I’m zo zorry.”

Carlotta scooped up Mr. Snuggles and put him into his owners waiting arms, leaving the doctor and the others speechless.

“I take it none of you have had any luck finding the right cat?” Dr. Dubowy said. “What’s the tobacco that Alexander smokes again?” He was a long time acquaintance of Waverly as they belonged to the same club.

“Isle of Dogs No. 22,” Lisa quickly answered.

“Here,” the vet pulled a twenty dollar bill from his wallet.”It won’t make up for this mess, but buy him some of his tobacco from me?”

Rogers accepted it with a nod of her head.

“Napoleon shrugged.”I guess we need to make another sweep of the entire...”

The chirp of his communicator interrupted his thought, and he quickly pulled it, stepping out of the exam room.

“Excuse us Doctor...Solo here.”

“Napoleon it’s Wanda. Mr. Waverly wants you all to return to headquarters immediately.”

“Emergency?”

“No, good news. The cat is here.”

“What? How?"

“He wandered into the tailor shop and Del brought him inside.”

.

“Well I'll be a son of a gun,” Napoleon muttered. "Thanks Wanda. Solo out."

“I would venture a guess that Shpion found his way home,” Illya said. “Another thing they are quite good at.”

“Hey Illya, look down at your feet,” Solo was suddenly grinning.

Sitting patiently beside Kuryakin was Wollman.

The Russian froze.

“Will you look at that tovarisch? And he didn’t even try to eat you.”

“Not yet,”Illya spoke out of the side of his mouth.

“Oh stop it ya big baby,” Lisa giggled. “Give him this and he’ll be your friend for life.” She reached over with a dog biscuit. “Now you wait Wolly. Illya’s going to give you a treat. Just hold it out for him and say...okay.”

“Must I?”

“Oh go on!” Napoleon insisted.”Would I put you in danger...no don’t answer that. Illya he’s not going to hurt you. Scout's honor.”

"Where have I heard that before?" Kuryakin finally accepted the biscuit and did as he was instructed. To his surprise Wollman took the treat from his hand is if it were made of delicate crystal.

“Are you happy now? May we go? Mr. Waverly is waiting for us.”

“See, told you so,” Napoleon grinned.

As Solo turned his back to his partner, Illya stuck his tongue out at him.

“I saw that,” Lisa whispered before she giggled like a kid.

* ref to my stories “Nina-chapter 57 Snapshots”, “Lucky,” and “A Snowy Day Surprise”

Special thanks to otherhawk for the use her OC, Shpion the cat.