Siobhan having Illya find her remains was pretty clear, but the burial and reporting to the authorities wasn't clear at all. Never got any of that. Maybe it was too subtle.
Yes extending the story with Paddy's ghost would be great. Instead of amending why not make it a longer story with a second chapter.
Illya not doing anything himself to help Siobhan after she went to the trouble to reveal herself to him as I said, is very un-Illya. This could be one of your best stories yet if you build on it.
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Re: hi
Date: 2014-03-18 08:02 pm (UTC)Yes extending the story with Paddy's ghost would be great. Instead of amending why not make it a longer story with a second chapter.
Illya not doing anything himself to help Siobhan after she went to the trouble to reveal herself to him as I said, is very un-Illya. This could be one of your best stories yet if you build on it.