For the Expanded Files Affair

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

I've had this for over a year-it's the seed of of something I want to expand but I'm stuck. Ideas for expansion and feedback would be appreciated!


Working title: Illya Woke and Yawned

Illya woke and yawned. He felt wonderful, as if he was floating on a cloud. Raising an eyelid, he was only slightly surprised to see his partner sitting in a chair next to his bed, reading a newspaper. He closed his eyes again. Well, perhaps he was a tad tired.


“Napoleon, what are you doing in my bedroom. Watching me sleep?”

“Bedroom? That’s rich. I was rather hoping you’d wake up.”

"I was tired.”

“That goes without saying.”

“I had the worst nightmare.”

“Really? Tell me about it.”

“I was captured, roughed up, flogged with a cat-o-nine tails, both legs broken, they even hooked me up to a battery for good measure; you know, just your run-of-the-mill every day standard THRUSH torture. Overall, a great deal of unpleasantness.”

“Illya...”

“Yes?”

“That was no nightmare.”

“What are you talking about, Napoleon?” Illya smirked, opening his eyes.

Napoleon rose and pulled back his covers to reveal long white plaster casts on both legs.

“It really happened.”

As realization set in, he shuddered. “But I don’t...it doesn’t… Oh. Morphine drip. How long?”

“Four days.”

Comments

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Very nice. I'd just add some more visuals, perhaps expanding the torture session so it's actually happening but maybe tone it down a wee bit so it isn't grisly... then IK could wake and start the conversation with NS as you wrote it.

It doesn't need much at all, unless you're planning to make a much longer story of it...but I think it's cool as a short piece.

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

Thanks. Glad you liked it, but I'm still at a loss. I thought of this as the beginning of the fic. Flashbacks are difficult to write without confusing the reader (and the writer in my case).

I want this to be longer with depth but not graphic and more than just angst.

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

If this is the beginning of the story, you've pretty much given it away. Maybe start with him being captured etc. like in real time. How was he rescued. Maybe bring the conclusion of him escaping/being freed as part of his dream. Then the reveal that he's in Medical? (as you've written here)

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

You're right, of course. Maybe he has flashes of what happened to him. Thanks, you've helped blow the dust off of this. ;D

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Not of course, it's just my impression. You have to trust your instincts as you know what sort of mood you want to set for this.

If he has flashes, then you'll give away he's already out of the situation, as he's 'remembering' it (for lack of a better word) Perhaps if you present what he's going through, how he got there and how he got out of it in real time...like it's happening now BUT have him actually remembering it all in a dream, like your presenting here (as I think that's what you want to have happen)

So rather than him recalling what happened, have him relive it in his morphine driven dream? Then have him wake up ...you've already written your ending here, per se.

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

Some interesting ideas.

I could go with flashes of memory in that they cause him to believe he's dreaming and really work that angle. He mind puts all the bits and pieces together so the only rational explanation is that it has to be a dream. The only other option is that it really happened and that's too difficult/painful for his mind to grasp.

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

I like the dream idea, but that's going to be hard. You pulled it off in Occam’s Razor...maybe it's too similar to use that sort of sequence again. Flashes of memory, so he's reliving it, making it sort of a psychological drama would be cool.

[otherhawk.livejournal.com]

If you did want this as the starting point, another direction you could take it would be to go into a questioning reality thing - I think the fact that he woke up feeling like his experience was a nightmare and assuming he was in his bedroom but not being surprised Napoleon was there, would go well with that. Maybe something like implanted memories - it'd be interesting if UNCLE were the ones doing the implanting.

Either that or you could again take this as a starting point and follow the recovery intertwined with more of a mission story, or maybe top secret information was leaked at the same time as Illya was being tortured and everyone thinks it was him?

Just random ideas, please ignore me. I do really like this as an opening, and I'd love to see it expanded however you want to take it. :)

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

Can you give me a little more about what you mean by "it'd be interesting if UNCLE were the ones doing the implanting."

Your idea about the leaked information is too close to another story I'm working on. (Great minds think alike.) In fact, this bit came out of that story, but didn't fit in very well so I removed it.

Thanks for the ideas. They are sorely needed for this short story I hope to make into a longer one. Any other thoughts are welcome.

[otherhawk.livejournal.com]

Eh, I was just thinking that if the torture wasn't exactly what had happened but a fake memory then it could make for a good tale if UNCLE had implanted it, maybe because they were covering up something worse, or something that he couldn't know but still needed to explain the injuries, or possibly a rogue faction within UNCLE who are trying to cover up their own misdeeds so that no one else knows that Illya's memories aren't real and he is looking crazy for trying to figure it out. Honestly, does that make any sense at all?

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

She actually did that scenario in one of her previous stories, though it was a Thrushie who was implanting the memories. Made for a great psychological drama

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

Yes! More cool ideas to ponder. I'm glad I posted the story here as there's many ways I could go with it now.

[threecee.livejournal.com]

Lots of directions to take this.You could go forward with a story of his recovery instead of working backwards about the mission.

I find myself wondering how he could cope with two broken legs if he can get them to let him out of Medical and will he recover enough to continue in Section II? Just how good does he feel on the morphine and will he have trouble getting off of it?

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

Interesting questions. Recovering from broken legs would sideline him for quite a while and make taking care of himself almost impossible unless he went to a rehab facility (not unlike my experience earlier this year when I broke an ankle). Loss of independence would be intolerable for an agent. I'm thinking IK would bristle!

Morphine addiction could a way to go also but according to fanon, he hates drugs and would stop taking them ASAP. I've had it in mind to make the guys more like everyone else and not have the strict guidelines of standard canon/fanon or have them be tough as nails.

Thanks for the insights. All of these ideas are helpful. I hate being stuck.