"The tooth will out" ~ for the Short Affair

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Challenge: The Short Affair

-Prompt Word #2 – Mercy

-Prompt Colour – Green

Author: mrua7

Title: “The tooth be told”

Word Count: Approximately 975

The 45 foot cabin cruiser was foundering in the rough seas and at least Napoleon and Illya’s captors had the decency to free then rather than let them down.

It wasn’t often Thrush agents garnered brownie points in Solo’s estimation; the man who was called Binks earned them for sure.

He was the one who removed their handcuffs and tossed them a pair of life jackets.

“Get up top quick. She’s going down and fast.”

The UNCLE agents scrambled top side to the deck, but not before they grabbed their guns and communicators left on a nearby shelf.

They watched as some of the crew launched the nearly empty life raft, pushing Binks away as he tried to get in it. There had been no time to send out a Mayday.

Binks and a few others now left behind were at least wearing their life vests as they hopped over the side into the churning waves.

“We need to get away from the boat before she submerges and sucks us down with her, “ Napoleon shouted.

“Wait, I saw an inflatable raft stowed forward!” Illya waved for his partner to follow him.

It was clearly marked in a container attached to the deck. The others must have forgotten about it in their panic.

“Help me get it open!” Illya called. The boat was sinking around them, as  the aft was nearly submerged.

Together they tugged at the lid but it wouldn’t give way. Napoleon spotted what looked like a piece of rebar and they used that to force it open.

Illya pulled a cord on the black rubber raft and it self inflated. Inside the storage container were stowed a pair of small wooden paddles; they grabbed those and pulled the now inflated raft down to the flooded deck.

From there the agents launched and furiously paddled to get away from the cruiser as it was in its deathroes, and was being drawn into the dark green waters with a sucking sound.

After it was gone, there was an eerie silence. It was as if the boat had never existed.

Not long after that they heard it, the first piercing scream.

“Sharks!”

Tiger sharks had appeared out of nowhere, a dozen or more, no doubt attracted by the sinking ship and the trashing of those still in the water.

At first they cruised, circling and circling. There were more screams now, blood curdling ones as the sharks began their feeding frenzy.

The agents paddled in their direction in hopes of rescuing whoever was left in the water. It was then they spotted Binks, swimming wildly towards them.

“Faster! Swim as fast as you can!” Solo called out as there was a large fin coming behind Binks.

Just as he reached the raft and had grabbed on to it, the shark surfaced. Its eyes black and lifeless rolled over white as its gaping mouth grabbed the helpless man.

Napoleon and Illya pounded the shark with the paddles for all the good it did. It grabbed hold of one them and bit into the wood, nearly dragging Napoleon into the water, but it released it and returned its attention to Binks.

He was pulled under, but seconds later he surfaced with a gurgling scream for help; the water around him was red with his blood, attracting yet another shark.

There was nothing that could be done to save him.

Showing mercy, Illya aimed his gun and fired, killing Binks instantly with a single well placed shot.

The UNCLE  agents bowed their heads, regretting they weren’t able to save the man who had saved them.

After their moment of silence, Napoleon pulled his communicator.

“Open Channel D.”

“Mister Solo, we were beginning to worry. Is Mr. Kuryakin with you?” Waverly asked;  his cool demeanor given way to one filled with obvious concern.

“Yes sir, we’re both unharmed but are in need of a water rescue. There is a life boat with some Thrushies in it in the area as well so they’ll need to be picked up.”

“ We’ve got a fix on your position. A rescue helicopter is on the way gentlemen. I’ll expect your report upon your return. Waverly out.”

Napoleon sat back in the raft with a sigh. “Well since our mission was a total washout...no pun intended, do you think we should play up the shark attack?”

“Oh and say we were almost eaten alive,” Illya nodded. “I suppose a little embellishment could not hurt. Still, the Old Man might not believe it as where will be the proof? Neither of us are injured.”

“Will you look at this?” Napoleon held up his paddle for Illya to see. Embedded in the wood was an immense shark’s tooth.

“I give you exhibit A, tovarisch,” Napoleon fought back a smile.

“Ahhh the tooth will out,” Illya nodded.

Not to be out done, Napoleon retorted,“Yes we’ll tell him the tooth and nothing but the tooth.”

This time he grinned as he watched Illya cover his eyes with his hand and shake his head.

“Yep, the tooth be told.”

“Oh Napoleon!”

“You can’t handle the tooth!”

“Keep it up Napoleon and I will throw you to the sharks!”

“You wouldn’t?”

“Try me.”

“Well you started it,” Napoleon chuckled.

“The tooth be told...I did.” Wanting to get the last word in for once Illya asked his partner a question. “ By the way, did you have your wisdom teeth removed?”

Napoleon was a bit confused as to why his partner was suddenly asking that. “Yes as a matter of fact I did. Why?”

“That explains why you have such a smart mouth,” Kuryakin quipped.

“Oh very funny,” Napoleon made ‘the’ face. He paused, canting his head to one side as he heard the distinct sound of Huey helicopter blades cutting the air.

“Ah the cavalry arrives in the nick of time,” he muttered to himself. Good thing as he was out of puns.

Comments

[rose-of-pollux.livejournal.com]

Now if there was only a way to be granted mercy from Napoleon and Illya's puns....

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Usually it's Solo who is the guilty party when it comes to puns, but in this case Illya started it. He got lucky Napoleon's repertoire ran dry.

Thanks for the comment!

[jantojones.livejournal.com]

I don't usually have sympathy for a Thrush,but I feel abit sorry for binks. Great story, and I think that, I too, would be sorely temped to throw Napoleon to the sharks, LOL.

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Thank you! It's not often we have a sympathetic Thrushie is there? Not quite sure how the puns got out of hand on this one, I suspect to alleviate the the sadness at not being able to save the man who saved them.

It actually was Illya fault as he uttered the first toothy pun, so he was asking for trouble.

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

I see you went overboard with this one. (sorry) :D

BTW, my tuxedo cats name is "Binx."

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Illya started it for once, so blame it on him, but of course Napoleon contented it You know these boys when they get competitive! Glad you enjoyed the story...hmmm and I knew something was familiar with that name. lol!

[glennagirl.livejournal.com]

IF they lie to Waverly it will be like playing a game of … wait for it … Tooth or Consequences.

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Ahhh, very punny...I meant funny. I just love it when people tooth their own horns...lol. Thank you! :D