Short Affair Challenge- "Neither a borrower nor lender be"

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Challenge: The Short Affair

-Prompt Word 1 - Vanity

-Prompt Colour – Blue

Author: mrua7

Title: “Neither a borrower nor a lender be”

Word count: Approximately 1.000

Napoleon Solo was known for having a bit of vanity when it came to his personal appearance. He liked the finer things in life like clothing, gourmet foods, and jewelry, along with entertaining the ladies.

He had a reputation as a great lover, and he treated his lady friends with respect and tenderness. He never forced himself upon a woman and if she wasn’t a willing bed mate, he took pleasure in just engaging her in pleasant and hopefully intelligent conversation.

He was a well educated man, cultured and at times he seemed more continental in his behavior than American.

One problem Napoleon had was with money. He came from a well off family and grew up in the Hamptons. His father, Darius Solo, a well respected Colonel in the U.S. Army wanted his eldest son to follow in his footsteps.

Instead, after finishing his tour of duty in Korea, Napoleon took Alexander Waverly up on his offer, and he was recruited to the U.N.C.L.E.

That didn’t sit well with his father at all, and Napoleon was cut off financially. The lifestyle he enjoyed prior to his stint in the army would no longer be, but Napoleon tried his darndest to enjoy the better things in life anyway.

Not that he wasn’t paid well for his work with the Command, as its top agent and Chief Enforcement Agent he earned a tidy sum. However, it never seemed to be enough when it came to pay the piper for his extravagant habits.

He’d hit up Illya for a loan, and the Russian who was quite tight with his money would gladly oblige as long as he received certain guarantees that he’d be paid back.

Sometimes that wasn’t always possible, so Kuryakin would take it back in trade, such as Napoleon preparing a nice home cooked meal for him, which usually consisted of a juicy steak, potatoes, vegetables, a salad and a good wine to accompany it all.

Solo wondered if he was getting the short end of the stick on that deal when it came to Illya’s boundless appetite. Still he couldn’t not pay back his partner and if it meant extra food, then so be it. For a frugal man, the Russian was generous when it came to helping out his partner when he was short of cash.

They’d just completed a rather convoluted mission in New Orleans, and while there Napoleon took the opportunity to order and purchase a pair of custom made alligator shoes.Though Illya saw it as rather convenien, when his partner went to pay for said shoes, he discovered his wallet had been stolen with all his cash.

Illya of course fronted the money for the shoes and was still waiting for it to be returned to him. However, he was a patient man and knew Napoleon would eventually give it to him. Still he took a little enjoyment in pestering Solo for it, as it made Napoleon squirm. Kuryakin sometimes had a strange sense of humor.

It was not like he needed the money as unlike the American, this Russian put his earnings aside for a rainy day. He was trying to think positively that he would survive to the retirement age.

Unlike THRUSH who gave their retiring agents a gold watch and a bullet to the head/ UNCLE agents were retired from the field upon reaching age of 40.They could opt to leave the Command all together, but depending upon their status they would be deprogrammed and set up in a job in the outside world or they could remain with UNCLE in whatever capacity was seen fit for them.

Napoleon was being groomed to take Waverly’s place in Section I when he retired or left this earth. Illya had the option of working with Section VIII in the labs, or he could move up to Section I most likely taking charge of Security for the organization. This would of course avoid deprogramming.

And now Kuryakin stood in the back room of a high end uptown haberdashery, watching Solo turning to admire his new dark blue double-breasted suit in a mirror. He’d ordered it some time ago and now it was finally ready.

He could have had Del Floria make it, but decided it was something UNCLE didn’t need to know about. Accounting was always watching his expenses and even though he wasn’t billing this to UNCLE, it was still none of their business.

“Will you please stop admiring yourself in the mirror so that we might go have some lunch? I am hungry.”

“Illya you’re always hungry and honestly with the way you pack away food I just don’t understand how you stay so…”

“Trim, fit?” The Russian finished the thought for his partner.

“I was going to say skinny.”

“Napoleon, food now.” Illya tone of voice changed as he didn't like being called skinny, and his annoyance was showing . Tit for tat, he brought up a topic to make his partner squirm, fair play for the 'skinny' remark.“By the way do you have the money you owe me?”

“Ummm, not quite. I needed to pay off the suit in order to pick it up. It goes well with my alligator shoes, don’t you think?

Illya clenched his fists, with his knuckles turning white as he kept his temper under control. Napoleon had gone too far.

"Hey doesn't it count for something that I didn't really tell Angelique that it was you who used the voodoo doll on her?

Kuryakin ignored his partner's apparent plea for leniency.

“You are paying for lunch, and possibly dinner everyday until you repay me and no using your expense account. Today you will be taking me to the Russian Tea Room.”

“Now wait a minute,” Solo protested.

“No more deals, no more delays. Either I get my money or you feed me every day until you make good on your promise to pay me back.”

Napoleon quietly removed his jacket and handed it to the tailor. He went into a dressing room and changed back to his grey suit. Pulling the tailor aside, speaking in whispers and money changed hands.

“Here’s most of your money tovarisch. I apologize for making you wait and putting my needs in front of yours. I'll just have pick up his new suit in few weeks. You’ll have the rest of your money tomorrow. I promise, really. I’ll just cancel my date with Wanda tonight and with Candy tomorrow. As an apology I’ll take you to the Russian Tea Room anyway.”

“Thank you my friend, I appreciate your consideration.”

“You’re welcome,” Solo looked somewhat sheepish.” Say could I borrow back some money for lunch?”

Kuryakin clicked his tongue; he simply turned and walked away, quoting Shakespeare as he did so.

“Neither a borrower nor a lender be, for loan oft loses both itself and friend.”

"Come on Illya, you know I'm always good for it?"

Napoleon watched as his partner walked out of the shop. He knew Kuryakin wouldn't be mad at him forever; now he just needed to scrounge up some cash to take him to the Tea Room. Maybe April could help him out?

He never borrowed money from her before; Napoleon smiled to himself.



A/N- this refernced my ABC Affair 2019 story 'A is for Alligator'

Comments

[laurose8.livejournal.com]

A nice little episode. And I doubt April will prove as long suffering as Illya.

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Thank you! In my stories, as you probably remember, Napoleon and April are romantically linked. If he wants his 'nooky' with her, he better pay her back! lol!