"No sense of humor" for the Short Affair challenge

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Challenge: Short Affair

-Prompt Word #1 - Gnaw

-Prompt Colour – Powder Blue

Title: No sense of humor

Author: mrua7

Word count: approx 775

Napoleon Solo was trying to ignore that feeling in the pit of his stomach, one that continued to gnaw at him for the last fifteen minutes.He was waiting on the outskirts of a small warehouse, a THRUSH satrap to where his partner had disappeared inside.

The Russian’s plan was to set charges and beat feet out, and now Napoleon waited for him to emerge before it all went up into smithereens.

Illya preferred to set his timers at a thirteen minute countdown, leaving just barely enough time to escape. Why he did this was anyone’s guess but his partner suspected it was a thrill to the man, that and the explosion itself.

So far Illya hadn’t appeared; he was now two minutes overdue, as was the explosion.

Napoleon looked upwards, squinting at the cloudless sky, almost powder blue in color...reminding him of his partner’s eyes.

“Illya, where the hell are you?”

No sooner had he said that than the Russian appeared, coming through the door at the front of the building at a dead run. Behind him was a bevy of Thrushies, firing away with their rifles.

Napoleon aimed, taking down two of them but what happened next took care of the rest.

Thank goodness they were lousy shots as he watched Illya deliberately dive to the ground.  He could hear Kuryakin counting down in Russian and Napoleon ducked as well, knowing what was about to happen.

“Tri-dva-odin…” Illya shouted.

The explosion was a big one, larger than Solo had anticipated, still it’s size didn’t surprise the American. Illya like his big ‘booms.’

The Thrushmen pursuing the UNCLE agent were taken off guard and the concussion from the explosion sent them all flying to the ground like ragdolls in a cloud of dust and debris.

As soon the air settled Illya rose, brushing off his black suit as best he could, and spotting Solo, he walked towards him flashing a broad smile.

“Cutting it a little close this time tovarisch?” Napoleon rose, wiping off the knees of his trousers with his hands.

“Well, I was discovered planting the last device and it took me a moment or two more to make my escape. Still it worked out well enough did it not, as did the explosion?” He glanced back at the smoldering remains of the building.

“Yes it was a mighty one,” Solo chuckled.”You really like setting them off don’t you. If I didn’t know you better I’d think you were some sort of crazed bomber like those characters in Mad Magazine.”

                               

Illya was taken aback for a second. “You think I look like one of those bird-like creatures? My nose is not that big and hardly resembles a beak. I think I take umbrage at such a comparison.”

Napoleon shook his head. “Sometimes you can’t take a joke. You need to lighten up.”

“That was a joke? I am used to your ridiculous puns but I simply do not understand your sense of humor at times.”

They wandered around what was left of the satrap, making sure the enemy agents were out of commission before they called for a cleanup team.

“Okay,” Napoleon paused.” How about I tell you a joke then, let's say as an experiment?”

“And what are the results you anticipate from this experiment?”

“To see if you have a sense of humor or not.”

Illya shook his head. “I do have one you know.”

“Well let’s do the test anyway chum, just for curiosity’s sake.”

“Tell away,” the Russian sighed, knowing it was going to happen, regardless of what he said.

“Here goes then, it’s a real short one. How does a spoiled rich girl change a lightbulb?”

“Napoleon why would I care about a bourgeois rich girl who would probably have some oppressed member of the proletariat do it for her instead of doing it herself?”

“Tovarisch, this is supposed to be a joke.”

“Fine, what is the punch line?” Illya anticpated rolling his eyes on this one.

“She says, Daddy, I want a new apartment."

“Sounds exactly like what a spoiled materialistic child would whine for. Upon hearing such things, it makes me a little homesick for…”

“I rest my case,” Napoleon chuckled.

“Well it was not funny in the least.”

“Just forget about it chum,” Napoleon shook his head.

“What did this have to do with me looking like one of those spy characters in Mad Magazine by the way?”

There were frustrating times like these that Solo wished he could use a sleep dart on his partner...

Comments

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Have always had a weird imagination, living alone with my pets doesn't help...

[lindafishes8.livejournal.com]

No, no, no. Not weird to me. Imaginative in a good way.