The Great Episode Challenge

[alynwa.livejournal.com]

Episode Title:  The Hula Doll Affair

Question:  In the episode’s prologue, Illya is in a bunker with an unnamed female UNCLE scientist waiting for the outside temperature to reach 90 degrees so he can observe the M4 explosive detonate. He seems quite attracted to her, even commenting that it is getting warm in there to which she replies, “Thank you.” She is never seen or mentioned again. The question is: What if Illya had acted on his attraction?
Story Title:  Valerie
Author: alynwa
Rating:  Gen
Word Count: 1776

He couldn’t get her out of his mind. He found himself thinking about her at the oddest times during the day and sometimes he dreamt of her at night. He hadn’t even found out her name until he had returned to New York Headquarters. Valerie Lewis, George said, a brilliant mind in an equally beautiful body. Illya put the report down that he was reading as he recalled his conversation with George Dennel down in the Section IV offices.

“Oh, the scientist who was overseeing the M4 project? Yes, I know her; Valerie Lewis. She has a PhD in chemistry, a beautiful woman. Why? Are you interested, Illya?”

“I think she and I might have some things in common, but she is stationed at our testing site in Nevada. It would be…impractical to contact her.”

George had smiled then and sing – songed “I know something you don’t know” much to the Russian’s annoyance.

Why must Americans be so smug?

“There’s a ‘Lessons Learned’ conference for all the personnel involved in M4’s development to be held here next week. I know for a fact that Miss Lewis will be attending.”

“And you know this how, exactly?”

“Illya, you wound me! Just because I’m not Section II doesn’t mean I can’t obtain information. I am the Head of Section VI, after all! Not only is she coming, she is requesting a transfer to the New York Lab.”

The public address system came on and Lisa Rogers’ voice came through it summoning Napoleon and him to Mr. Waverly’s office, so his conversation with George ended abruptly, but he was inwardly excited though he looked his normal serious and dour self to everyone he passed on his way to Section I.

Fortunately, for him at least, Mr. Waverly just informed them that they would be remaining in HQ, circumstances permitting, for the next month. The Old Man was aware that Illya had several projects at critical junctures in the lab (What doesn’t he know? he wondered for the hundredth time.) and Napoleon had a veritable mountain of backlogged agent evaluations that needed doing.

When they returned to their office, the first thing the Russian did was hold up his hand and say, “No, Napoleon, I will not be helping you with your paperwork. Only the CEA can evaluate the probationary agents.”

“Honestly, Illya,” Napoleon groused, “I wasn’t going to ask you to type anything. However, you did oversee Braithwaite, Pridgeon and Cole on their courier missions. I just want your input, that’s all.”

“My input is in a folder in your Inbox marked ‘Confidential from IK.’ I will be in the labs quite a bit over the next few weeks, Napoleon. I suggest that you take advantage of the solitude you will have to catch up on your paperwork before Mr. Waverly has you demoted. I will see you later.” And with that, he turned and went out the door, not realizing how close he came to having a paperweight hit him in the back.

Illya arrived to work early the day of the conference. Since he had not been involved with the development of M4, he was not going to be a participant, but he was hoping that he would see Miss Lewis before the 9AM meeting started. Feeling buoyant, he went to his office to drop off his coat. He was a little surprised to note that Napoleon’s coat and briefcase were already there, though he was not. The Russian knew that his partner was loathe to report to work much earlier than nine when he was working out of HQ. Obviously, he is feeling pressured to complete all of his reports, he thought with a grin. He hung his coat on a hook and decided to head off to grab a cup of coffee before going to Section VIII’s conference room to “accidentally” bump into Valerie.

He entered the Commissary and glanced at the area where most Section IIs sat and didn’t see Napoleon. When he turned to head to the coffee dispenser, he saw his partner standing with a small group holding a cup and a conversation. The three men were unfamiliar to him, but the woman in the group he recognized immediately: Valerie Lewis. He was caught in a moment of indecision brought on by the unexpected sight, but recovered instantly and proceeded to pour the coffee and head to the cashier. He knew his partner well enough to know that any single, young, pretty woman within ten feet of him he considered fair game for mounting. I will just go to work, he thought with a sigh of resignation. Just then, Napoleon turned and saw the blond.

“Illya! C’mere! These are some of the scientists from Nevada!”

He stilled his face and walked to his partner’s side. “Illya, this is Neville Channing, Tim Dutton, Fred Theisfield and this lovely lady is Valerie Lewis. Everyone, this is my partner, Illya Kuryakin.”

Illya shook the men’s hands and turned toward Valerie. “Yes, we met at the M4 test range. It is good to see you again.”

She smiled and replied, “Thank you. Napoleon was telling us about some of the sights to see while we’re here and when I told him I’ve never been to New York, he offered to take me to the top of the Empire State Building this evening and to dinner afterwards. Why don’t you get a date and join us?”

“No, thank you. I have…other plans. If you will excuse me,” he said formally and turned away and headed directly out the exit door.

Even though he and Illya had only been partnered for eighteen months, he knew the Russian well enough to see that he was perturbed about something, but he wasn’t sure what. His attention was pulled back to the scientists when one of the men patted his arm, apparently unaware that touching a Section II uninvited is not the smartest thing to do. “What?” he said with just a hint of annoyance.

“Nice to meet you, Napoleon, but we have to get downstairs to the meeting,” Tim said as he and his colleagues began to move. “See you later.”

Napoleon smiled, said goodbye and mouthed to Valerie I’ll see you later as she smiled back in response. He decided to get back in line to buy a pastry to go along with his coffee, but George Dennel waved him over to his table.

“Hi, Napoleon. I couldn’t get Illya’s attention and I’m dying of curiosity, so I’m asking you: Did your partner make a date with Valerie Lewis?”

“Ah, no, I don’t think so.”

George leaned back in his chair. “Oh, boy. I was sure he did when I saw the two of you talking to the folks from Nevada. Illya likes her; he told me so. I guess he wants to wait until he can get her by herself. Yeah, that’s probably it. He’ll catch up to her after her meeting.”

“Well, since it seems you’ve asked and answered your own question, I’m going to take my leave. Have a good day, George,” the CEA replied smoothly before he headed out the door, pastry forgotten. He hadn’t let on, but he was sure he now knew what had upset Illya. I better go talk to him.

He took the elevator to Illya’s lab and was relieved to see he was alone, bent over a microscope. “I want to talk to you.”

The smaller man straightened up at the sound of Napoleon’s voice. “This is not a good time; I need to observe what is occurring on this slide.”

Napoleon waved his hand dismissively. “This will only take a moment and it’s important. Why didn’t you tell me you were interested in Valerie? For that matter, why didn’t you tell me you had met a woman while you were in Nevada?”

Illya stiffened at Napoleon’s tone and cast his eyes downward. “Are you asking as my superior? I did not think I had to share what I think privately with you.”

The CEA huffed in exasperation and began to pace. “We work so well together in the field. We seem to be well – matched; I like you as a partner, but I also like you as a person. I thought you felt the same way. I thought we were becoming friends…”

“We are, Napoleon.”

“Well, here’s a newsflash for you, Pal o’ Mine: Friends talk to each other! I had to hear from George Dennel that you like this girl. You know how that made me feel? To find out that I blocked you from asking her out because I asked first? I feel like a first – class bum! I’m going to cancel with her.”

“No, do not do that, Napoleon. She has done nothing wrong; she has no idea that I was interested. She is looking forward to this evening.”

The taller man plopped down on a stool and thought for a moment. “Fine, but this will be our one and only date. Are you going to ask her out?”

“Not now.”

“Illya, I promise I won’t put any moves on her, if that’s what’s bothering you.”

“I do not expect you to understand this, but I do not wish to be compared with you as a date. She has requested a transfer to New York, if that happens, perhaps in time, I will ask her to accompany me to dinner and a movie, but not now.” He stepped closer to the seated man and tentatively placed his hand on Napoleon’s shoulder. “I do appreciate you trying to make amends, but there is no need. You did not know. I am not used to sharing my personal life. You are a friend and I trust you. I will try to be more forthcoming in the future.”

Napoleon’s smile dazzled. “That’s all I ask.” He stood and began to walk to the door. “I’ve got to get to work on my reports. Are we okay here?”

Illya’s smile equaled his partner’s. “If I say ‘yes,’ will you go away and let me conduct my experiments?” When Napoleon nodded, he said, “Da, we are okay. I will come to the office at one so you can buy me lunch. The special in the Commissary is pot roast.”

“It’s a date,” the CEA replied before exiting.

Illya shook his head and thought how differently things would have gone if he and one of his KGB superiors were interested in the same woman. As he bent over his microscope to resume his work, his last thought on the subject was: Let us see what happens if her transfer here is approved.

Comments

[jantojones.livejournal.com]

Such a bitter/sweet tale. Poor Illya, beaten to the punch by Napoleon. Fair play to Napoleon though, for being willing to step aside.

Great start to your new challenge.

[alynwa.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

[mrua7.livejournal.com]

Always a bridesmaid but never a bride...decent of Napoleon to offer to step aside and even more so to promise not to 'put any moves on her.' The last line was so 'Illya.'

Your new challenge is off to a good start. Good luck to it!

[alynwa.livejournal.com]

Thanks, glad you enjoyed it.

[laurose8.livejournal.com]

Neat ending! I like George Dennell, too, and his input.

Also, the bit where Illya dodges the paperwork.

[alynwa.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[glennagirl.livejournal.com]

I assume she will get the transfer, and we will see what happens ;) It's a very believable scenario, but an honorable Napoleon to be sure.

[alynwa.livejournal.com]

I left it open-ended because I may revisit this in the future. It's the latest on my long list of stories to be expanded. Thanks for commenting.